


I WILL TURN THIS SHIP AROUND

by Complete_Otakuness



Series: Going in Blind [2]
Category: Firefly
Genre: Arguing, Crack, Don't Judge Me, Drabble, Gen, Humor, Jayne would look good in a dress, Kaylee is a savage, River needs her nap
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-28
Updated: 2021-01-28
Packaged: 2021-03-13 20:49:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 436
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29034948
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Complete_Otakuness/pseuds/Complete_Otakuness
Summary: Poor River, she just wanted to have a nice nap... too bad the rest of the team is too loud for any semblance of sleep or functionality.
Relationships: Jayne Cobb & Zoë Washburne, Kaylee Frye & Inara Serra
Series: Going in Blind [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2128236
Comments: 2
Kudos: 3





	I WILL TURN THIS SHIP AROUND

**Author's Note:**

  * For [](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts).



“Oh you wanna go? Well then let’s go!”

“No need, I already know I can beat you.”

Jayne and Zoë were arguing. Over what, no one cared. What they did care about, however, was the fact that it was really loud. Inara, Hoban, and Simon were bearing witness to this, both covering their ears to avoid potential damage, while the others could almost definitely hear them too. Finally Simon decided that enough was enough and approached the two, one spitting like a cat and the other doing her best to seem indifferent to the ruckus.

“Kindly shut up you two, River’s taking her nap. You know how she gets when she doesn’t get her nap, don’t you?” Everyone in the ship shuddered at the thought. They didn’t want Shepherd to freak out over another destroyed copy of the New Testament. Or the engines to nearly be turned into scrap metal.

“She started it!”

“Oh? And please, tell me, what exactly is wrong with me giving you clothing advice?”

“I DON’T WANT TO LOOK LIKE A DOLL!”

“Awwww but you’d look so cute in one of Kaylee’s dresses! Add a bit of makeup and you’d be perfect!” Inara jumped in, covering her mocking giggles with her hand at the thought.

A shout emerged from above them at the comment, “I hope to God you try to get yer hands on one of my dresses you filthy pig!”

“SHUT IT KAYLEE, YOU HAVE ENOUGH DRESSES TO PUT ON THREE FASHION SHOWS!” Inara yelled back.

“Well maybe I’ll make one just for you! You can wear toilet paper and we’ll flush you afterward!”

“What about me? Don’t I get to look fabulous too? I mean, more fabulous than I already am, obviously,” Malcolm called, clearly wanting to feel included.

“Of course! You can wear my toilet paper dress!” Inara exclaimed in fake delight. Though no one could see it, they knew Malcolm had pouted at that comment.

“At least I’d look good in it.” 

Inara facepalmed and started to form a comeback, but was interrupted by very violent stomping. The residents all froze and exchanged glances of “Oh shit” before their gazes fell upon a very angry girl.

“If you all want to fight so much, why don’t we drop you off on some asteroid somewhere?” River’s voice was even, and scarily quiet. “In fact, I think I saw us just pass one big enough to fit three of you. Why not have a little battle royale to settle this?”

Simon was sweating and he glared at the others. “I told you not to wake her up, didn’t I?”

**Author's Note:**

> The summary my friend gave me for this was “Basically a spaghetti western in space. The ship is practically an abandoned clown factory.” Don't worry, the character descriptions came right after so I didn't have to suffer in complete confusion.


End file.
